A combination of my sister turning 21 and the fact that it’s summer, which means it’s always time for excessive drinking, have added up to making me act like a 21-year-old one too many times in the past couple weeks. Therefore, I have mastered how to drink like a 21-year-old:
Step #1: Be sure to have a variety of different alcohols to drink throughout the night. Pick up some cider, beer and wine. Don’t worry, we’ll get to the hard stuff later…
Step #2: Chug something before going out to the bars. Chug Anything. I usually choose something inappropriate like red wine. Bonus points if it spills all over you.
Step #3: After drinking all your beer & wine, it’s obviously time to go out in public and drink hard liquor. By this time, you’ll probably be stumbling around like a complete idiot.
Step #4: Once you’re drunk and should probably stop drinking, don’t. Start buying shots. Buy them for everyone. You don’t have any money in your bank account? Who cares!
Step #5: Dance. Dance anywhere whether or not it has a dance floor. And don’t stop dancing until 2 a.m. unless it’s to take shots.
Step #6: Find something delicious to eat like Mickey D’s or T. Bell and eat WAAAAY too much of it.
Step #7: Pass out.
Ugh. What a mess.
Seriously… don’t do this.