Oh how I love you
You make drunk food like pizza ashamed
You are fruity and chocolaty and magically delicious
All people should love your perseverance (you can leave them in the freezer forever and forget they are there until the best moment ever! spoiler alert – that moment is now)
Never leave me
You are amazing
Heart
Ray Ray
1. One Direction. Or any pop star targeting tweens. Especially if they have a fantastic 3D movie.
2. Food Made for Kids. Chicken Nuggets, Corn Dogs, Spaghettios, Fish Sticks.
3. Watching the Same TV Shows Over & Over. Friends. Friday Night Lights. One Tree Hill.
4. Lifetime or ABC Family Movies. All of them.
5. Eating the Salt out of the Bottom of the Bag of Popcorn. It’s really disgusting, but I can’t help it. It’s extra delicious when it’s full of butter.
6. Leggings as Pants. Super comfortable.
7. Eating Deli Meat Plain. Ham or Turkey.
8. Boxed Wine. Chillable Red. Yum.
9. BOGO. I’ve spent so much money on things I don’t need just because they’re on BOGO.
10. Soft Pretzels from a Bar. I don’t even have to be hungry, but if I go to a bar that’s known for delicious soft pretzels, I’ll order them.
If you like to drink as much as we do, it’s very important to try and stay active at the same time. And as we head into colder, darker months, it’s harder to get motivated to work out and stay fit. So we’ve come up with a very doable routine that anyone – seasoned athletes and rookies both – can commit to throughout the winter. It’s as easy as 1-2-3:
To avoid boredom and make time pass quickly (which is super important if you hate working out as much as we do), circuit workouts are key. Here’s a plan we suggest:
Based on your current fitness level, repeat the circuit anywhere from three to five times. We started with three and that has proved to be a tough enough 40 minutes for us…for now 🙂 You can mix and match your cardio and strength activities to keep the workout interesting. We have decided to do a different activity each time, which seems to be working well and is definitely challenging. Especially when we get to the ones we hate doing – like burpees.
Then for the days of cardio, we prefer to go to 45-minute cycling classes, but you can do anything you’d like. Running, biking, swimming – whatever suits you best. And mix it up!
There you have it, Awkward Vodka’s workout plan. Much better than Kanye’s if I do say so myself.
It’s as easy as that! Well let me take that back. It’s not as easy as it sounds. See the picture below as evidence. That’s us after Day 1:
But our plan is to continue to stick with this routine so eventually it will become easier. And we’ll be super strong. See us already on Day 3. Look at that confidence, already taking barftastic gym mirror selfies:
Hydrate. It is very important to stay hydrated before, during and after workouts.
Solicit a workout buddy. Let me tell you, it is way easier to get out of bed in the morning / stay accountable to these workouts if you know someone else is joining you. Plus, it’s always fun to have someone to commiserate with while going through these hellish activities.
Use apps: Not just for drinking anymore! One of our fav power hour app also works as a handy timer/playlist as we’re going through our circuits. After a minute, the song changes and so does our activity. We don’t need to keep an eye on the clock and get to enjoy soooo much more good pump-up music than with a regular playlist.
Let us know if you have any other tips or workouts we should consider. Joining us on our fitness kick? Let us know! We’d love to complain with you about how much it sucks.
It’s like Christmas for Vodka lovers – National Vodka Day!
Here are some ideas of how to celebrate:
1. Try out a new vodka drink, like this delicious one.
2. Get a tattoo of the word “Vodka”
3. Go to happy hour after work. Drink lots.
4. Play a fun drinking game like Ring of Fire or the iPod Game.
5. Black Out.
6. Do a taste test between different types of vodka. Be sure to try out a new kind you’ve never had before.
7. Take artsy photos of Vodka bottles, martinis and other delicious vodka drinks and post on your Instagram, Facebook, Foursquare and Twitter. Extra points if your chugging straight from the bottle in the pic.
9. Order a vodka shot when you’re out tonight. Just vodka – nothing extra.
10. Stay out celebrating until at least 5 a.m.
For those of your who love everything awesome – it’s also National Taco Day!
BEST. DAY. EVER.
Vodka diet coke has been my favorite drink since I started drinking. It’s so easy and delicious. However, everyone likes to try out something new every once & awhile.
My new favorite drink: vodka water.
Well not just vodka water, but vodka + water + a squirt of MiO water flavoring
Why I love this drink:
So try it out! You’ll love it.
1. Football
2. Halloween
3. Comfort Food: Chilli. Soup. Pasta.
4. Fun Accessories: Boots & Scarves
5. Pumpkin-Flavored Deliciousness
6. Changing Leaves
7. 13 Nights of Halloween on ABC Family
8. Carving Pumpkins
9. Candy Corn
10. Season Premiers: Scandal, New Girl, Mindy Project, The Voice, Castle and More!
11. Candles
12. Fresh Air & Open Windows: No More Air Conditioning
13. Smells: Cinnamon & Vanilla
14. Hot drinks
15. Jumping into piles of leaves
WOOHOO!!! It’s finally here: Football Season!
The best part of football season, besides seeing the Packers kick ass, is tailgating. Since we’re from Wisconsin, we’ve been tailgating since birth so we’re pretty much professionals. Here are some tips and tricks for tailgating:
Any other tailgating tips we missed?
HAPPY FOOTBALL!!
Power Hour: A drinking game that means taking a shot of beer every minute for one hour which, using math, means drinking 5 beers in an hour. – Urban Dictionary
With yet another national holiday weekend upon us, we have a feeling a few of you might already be planning your weekend. Since we hope some of your plans include drinking, we’d like to share a few tips if that drinking happens to be a power hour (one of Awkward Vodka’s favorite past times).
Download an app. One way to ensure you complete the power hour on time and not miss a single shot is by downloading an app. You don’t have to worry about changing the music every minute or yelling at your friends to drink – the app will automatically switch the music, queuing your time to drink. GENIUS. We recommend Power!Hour, the best $.99 you’ll ever spend.
Do not, I repeat, do not attempt a power hour with hard liquor. While it may be tempting, do not use hard liquor as your drink of choice. That means 60 shots in 60 minutes. You most likely will die. We here at Awkward Vodka do not endorse this and definitely do not want to be blamed for death or alcohol poisoning. And I know what you’re thinking, mixed drinks aren’t that bad! Trust me, they are. You will either be passed out, puking or black out by halftime.
Always have an extra drink nearby. There is nothing worse than having to search for a beer when one runs out, especially if that means getting behind.
Make sure the beer is cold. I take it back – the one thing worse than having an empty drink is warm beer. You go through them fast in a group during a power hour, so make sure you have enough chilling for hours before you begin.
Music is key. During the power hour you can go through 60 different songs of your choice. And if you use the app we mentioned above, they all come right from your iTunes. Can you say best dance party ever? I guarantee you’ll hear, “I LOVE THIS SONG!” screamed at least 20 times.
Don’t double time. Just don’t do it.
With these tips we hope you can enjoy one perfect power hour this three-day weekend. But what about you? What other tips/recommendations do you have when it comes to power hours? We want to hear them!
1. We know how to drink. Beer. Whiskey. Vodka. You name it. We drink it. And we know how to handle our booze so you don’t need to take care of us after a night of binging.
2. We love sports. And know enough to actually talk about what’s happening during a game. GO PACKERS!
3. We’re hilarious. See any other post on Awkward Vodka.
4. We’re typically low maintenance. Yes, we like to look good, but we also enjoy going to the bar in just a t-shirt and jeans. Have we ever been to a bar in sweatpants? You bet we have.
5. We’ve accumulated to the cold weather. And know how to dress for the cold so we’ll never need to steal your jacket.
6. We’re Tough. See above about the cold. Also most of us know how to change a tire, shovel a car out of the snow and get out of – or start – a bar fight.
7. We’re Smart. At least most of us are smart! Check out this list of the smartest cities in the country. Madison is #8, Appleton is #12 and Milwaukee is #26. Not bad! Minnesota doesn’t even show up on the list under #33 and it says “Minneapolis-St. Paul-Bloomington, MN-WI”
8. We’re Not Afraid to Get Dirty. We’re not prissy since we either grew up on a farm or have been on one at some point in our life.
9. No Need to Wine & Dine. Obviously we love a nice dinner every now & then, but usually we’ll be just as happy with a delicious meal at Culvers as we are with a fancy dinner.
10. We Accept Hunting & Fishing. We’re okay with our guy leaving for a week to go hunting with friends, we’ll craft shop and scrapbook while they’re gone.
awkward vodka 